To those who are Childless, Motherless, or Somewhere in Between this Mother’s Day

Hello, Voyagers. Look, I don’t know if you have children, don’t want them, or are having a hard time either way. But this post is for all of you, a little perspective on what it’s like for the rest of us on this holiday.

Maybe you don’t have kids and never wanted them but are tired of hearing what glorious activities little Hunter and tow-headed Riley are up to after school.

Maybe you wanted kids but were unable to have them and it hurts your heart looking at photos of the athletic Jaxson or ballerina Tenley on the first day of school…Halloween…Christmas…Mother’s Day. And by god you love and support your friends AND their children but if you click “like” on any posts of kid, baby, or sonogram, you’ll just be subjected to more and more of the same in your news feed so you have to ignore them or delete them or mute them. And then feel guilty as hell for it.

Maybe you have lost your mother, biological or chosen, it’s rough to think of spending another holiday that is dedicated to her without her, and all of those signs in store windows, emails with gift ideas, Facebook memories, and Mother’s Day morning breakfast in bed social media posts are just too much to bear.

Maybe you have kids but your relationship with them isn’t as easy - or joyful -as your Instagram shows.

Maybe, just maybe, you tragically lost a child or gave birth to one who was adopted or raised by others and when someone asks you if you have kids, you literally don’t know how to answer that.

Or maybe you simply want to ask people to slow their roll posting “my kids love me SO MUCH” on their social media but you’re not allowed to say anything because what kind of asshole resents other people celebrating their own family…kids…motherhood (🙋‍♀️)?

This is something not a lot of people want talk about, seemingly making something selfish out of something joyful for other people, if you want to see it that way. Feel free to judge away at me for trying to speak up for those of us trying to protect our emotional selves during this particular week.

So, this Mother’s Day, imma to try to send out all the love and joy and grace I got in my little heart to all y’all who are being celebrated by your beloved children.

And I’m asking y’all to have a little bit of grace when it comes to those of us who…aren’t.

-VV

P.S. Breakfast in bed? Overrated.